*Trans* Tip of the Week
September 17: There is true power in acknowledging one's own privilege. Each person, regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, gender identity, age, spiritual practice, or otherwise, has some form of privilege. We have a choice to recognize our privilege and help others garner opportunity. Or, we can choose to ignorantly go through the World believing that we earned everything we ha... ve received. [#knowledgeispower]
[“People who imagine that history flatters them (as it does, sine they wrote it) are impaled on their history like a butterfly on a pin and become incapable of seeing or changing themselves, or the world. This is the place in which it seems to me, most white Americans find themselves. Impaled. They are dimly, or vividly, aware that the history they have fed themselves is mainly a lie, but they do not know how to release themselves from it, and they suffer enormously from the resulting personal incoherence.” - James Baldwin, “The White Man’s Guilt,” Ebony, August 1965]
[“People who imagine that history flatters them (as it does, sine they wrote it) are impaled on their history like a butterfly on a pin and become incapable of seeing or changing themselves, or the world. This is the place in which it seems to me, most white Americans find themselves. Impaled. They are dimly, or vividly, aware that the history they have fed themselves is mainly a lie, but they do not know how to release themselves from it, and they suffer enormously from the resulting personal incoherence.” - James Baldwin, “The White Man’s Guilt,” Ebony, August 1965]
September 10: Live your life to the fullest. If you don't know how to live your life to the fullest, talk to someone at least 20 years older than you and ask them if there is anything they wish they had done earlier in life. If the answer is yes, ask them what it is they wish they had done and ask them why they didn't do it. Ask them how doing that one thing would have changed their life. Be sure to check out their facial expression, tone and voice as they speak. Then, ask yourself if there is anything that you wish to do and that you aren't doing because of circumstances or for the sake of another person. If the answer is yes, ask yourself do you want to be the person regretting a decision to not live your full life in 20 years.
Food for thought; enjoy your week!
[The Top 10 Regrets in Life By Those About to Die
9. “Not having the courage to live truthfully”
Looking back, people would wonder whether things would have been better if they were truly honest about who they really are. They think about the distress they caused themselves and others by pretending to be someone they’re not. You will naturally have concerns about whether people would reject you or accept you if you came clean; you might find it easier to compromise yourself just to be liked or loved. There are some situations when things need to be kept hidden, but honesty is generally admired. If you are reviled for who you really are, then that’s how you can determine the people who really love you. If you don’t yet have the courage to be truthful to others, you can start being truthful to yourself.]
September 3: Be yourself, be your Full Self. As we are open, honest and truthful to our core Self, we give others permission to d the same; act out of love and compassion, love us and love themselves. When we shrink and cower out of fear, we stifle our growth, limit our progression and don't give ourselves the opportunity to be our Full Self.
Today, make a commitment to be you, the full You; to love yourself in spite of what others may think, take risks that otherwise would be shoved away and make choices that fulfill your spirit.
August 27: The HIV/AIDs epidemic remains a significant health challenge in the United States, with an estimated 1.2 million people living with the disease. Of this group, the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) estimates that 20 percent are unaware of their infection. [*Please note that not all trans tips of the week are directly trans-related*]
To find out where to get tested, visit http://hivtest.cdc.gov/
If live in Pittsburgh, you can get free testing at Pittsburgh AIDS Task Force.
July 16, 2012: For trans-identified folks, understand that those those in your life, family, partners, friends, co-workers, etc., are going through your transition with you. Just as you are on your journey, so are they and for them it may take longer because they are not personally transitioning but are observing your transition from the outside looking in. Appreciate that they are willing to take the journey, have compassion as they change and love them through it all.
July 9, 2012: Take a moment to change the name that you have saved in e-mail and phone contacts for a trans person once you know or they tell you their name has changed. Doing this will help to encourage one to associate the name with the person. Also, it will help one not mistakenly call a trans person by the wrong name over the phone or through email.
June 25, 2012: It is vital to ask for one's preferred pronoun. Regardless of what you perceive as one's gender, one may prefer to be called he, she, ze, etc. For those that are supportive trans allies, when a trans person is pre-transition it is even more important for those in their life to affirm their identity.
[Example: Calling a transman "handsome" or "brother"]
[Example: Calling a transwoman "beautiful" or "girl"]
June 18, 2012: Trans persons can tell someone themselves if they want to be out as trans. Be mindful not to out a trans person, even incidentally. Example: If a woman friend attended Morehouse College, be mindful that others may make a connection. If a male friend played field hockey, this is a marker. Not all trans people want others to know that they are trans, especially in the beginning of a relationship/friendship.
June 11, 2012: Do not ask for a trans persons "real" name or birth name. It is not acceptable to ask the person or someone who has that knowledge. This is a trigger for many trans persons and strips a trans person of their choice to disclose that information. It is a total violation of privacy and opens up old (or fresh) wounds.
June 4, 2012: When you refer to a trans person in the past tense, one should either use their current name or current preferred gender pronoun. For example ["Michael David used to play field hockey in high school" or "He graduated from Chatham University in 2009"]
Food for thought; enjoy your week!
[The Top 10 Regrets in Life By Those About to Die
9. “Not having the courage to live truthfully”
Looking back, people would wonder whether things would have been better if they were truly honest about who they really are. They think about the distress they caused themselves and others by pretending to be someone they’re not. You will naturally have concerns about whether people would reject you or accept you if you came clean; you might find it easier to compromise yourself just to be liked or loved. There are some situations when things need to be kept hidden, but honesty is generally admired. If you are reviled for who you really are, then that’s how you can determine the people who really love you. If you don’t yet have the courage to be truthful to others, you can start being truthful to yourself.]
September 3: Be yourself, be your Full Self. As we are open, honest and truthful to our core Self, we give others permission to d the same; act out of love and compassion, love us and love themselves. When we shrink and cower out of fear, we stifle our growth, limit our progression and don't give ourselves the opportunity to be our Full Self.
Today, make a commitment to be you, the full You; to love yourself in spite of what others may think, take risks that otherwise would be shoved away and make choices that fulfill your spirit.
August 27: The HIV/AIDs epidemic remains a significant health challenge in the United States, with an estimated 1.2 million people living with the disease. Of this group, the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) estimates that 20 percent are unaware of their infection. [*Please note that not all trans tips of the week are directly trans-related*]
To find out where to get tested, visit http://hivtest.cdc.gov/
If live in Pittsburgh, you can get free testing at Pittsburgh AIDS Task Force.
July 16, 2012: For trans-identified folks, understand that those those in your life, family, partners, friends, co-workers, etc., are going through your transition with you. Just as you are on your journey, so are they and for them it may take longer because they are not personally transitioning but are observing your transition from the outside looking in. Appreciate that they are willing to take the journey, have compassion as they change and love them through it all.
July 9, 2012: Take a moment to change the name that you have saved in e-mail and phone contacts for a trans person once you know or they tell you their name has changed. Doing this will help to encourage one to associate the name with the person. Also, it will help one not mistakenly call a trans person by the wrong name over the phone or through email.
June 25, 2012: It is vital to ask for one's preferred pronoun. Regardless of what you perceive as one's gender, one may prefer to be called he, she, ze, etc. For those that are supportive trans allies, when a trans person is pre-transition it is even more important for those in their life to affirm their identity.
[Example: Calling a transman "handsome" or "brother"]
[Example: Calling a transwoman "beautiful" or "girl"]
June 18, 2012: Trans persons can tell someone themselves if they want to be out as trans. Be mindful not to out a trans person, even incidentally. Example: If a woman friend attended Morehouse College, be mindful that others may make a connection. If a male friend played field hockey, this is a marker. Not all trans people want others to know that they are trans, especially in the beginning of a relationship/friendship.
June 11, 2012: Do not ask for a trans persons "real" name or birth name. It is not acceptable to ask the person or someone who has that knowledge. This is a trigger for many trans persons and strips a trans person of their choice to disclose that information. It is a total violation of privacy and opens up old (or fresh) wounds.
June 4, 2012: When you refer to a trans person in the past tense, one should either use their current name or current preferred gender pronoun. For example ["Michael David used to play field hockey in high school" or "He graduated from Chatham University in 2009"]
